perspective from a mixed millennial

I’m both.

Half black. Half white. 

Growing up biracial in Minnesota, I experienced little discriminatory comments here and there, but I never experienced full on racism to the point of feeling or being treated as less than human. 

I know I know, it’s because I’m half white. I grew up in a majority white state and the problems I dealt with didn’t involve racial tension, it involved experiencing identity issues as a kid where I explicitly felt as if I had to choose a side. 

Be friends with the White kids, and I’d never fully “fit in” because I was black. 

Be friends with the Black kids, and I’d never fully “fit in” because I was white. 

As I grew older, I recognized my desire to maturely understand those identity issues. Why did I feel that way? What was I missing? 

But it wasn’t a matter of “fitting in”. It was a matter of understanding my own people’s suffering in todays world. I was aware that racism existed. I read about it in history books, saw it on the news, and heard stories from my Black side of the family of what they’ve experienced. 

But I didn’t know the extreme extent that dehumanization of Black individuals played in our society because I never personally experienced it. I wanted to become more aware. Not just read about it, but KNOW it.

I needed to fully understand BOTH parts of me. 

So I moved to the place where the history was written and the traumatic stories unfolded. 

Down South. 

I came here for many reasons. But surrounding myself in cultural diversity was one of them. 

Living in a majority Black city, I experienced many misconceptions and stereotypical comments because I was half White. People judged me, and they judged hard. 

“Why do you talk white, Angel?” 

“Is your white family racist, Angel?” 

“What even are you, Angel?” 

Although questions like these frustrated me, I had to remember why I moved here in the first place.

I felt the deeply rooted pain. The underlying hurt and heaviness weighing on my people that was brought on by a system built on White privilege. The unfortunate, yet understandable, discomfort of being a Black man or Black woman in America. The constant fear of your own safety as you walk outside because the “freedom” that America promised you is realistically limited. 

Being raised up North, was much different from living down South. 

And with that understanding, I had to be the “listener” in many conversations. I couldn’t vouch for my White family by saying that not all White people are evil, and I couldn’t vouch for myself as a Biracial kid who experienced discrimination on both ends. I just had to listen. And understand. 

My brothers and sisters, both Black and White. My heart aches for us.

My heart aches for my Black brothers and sisters who were killed out of heinous acts.

My heart aches for Black parents having to teach their kids the unfortunate precautions to take when going outside just to avoid getting killed.

My heart aches for my future Black self knowing that I’ll be having those exact same conversations with my children.

My heart aches for my prejudiced White brothers and sisters who do not see all races as one, and all races as HUMAN.

My heart aches for my White brothers and sisters who want peace and unity but can’t seem to get it because of a system built on their race, disadvantaging anyone else of another.

I question if there will ever be healing between us both. 

I question if I will always feel stuck in finding the solution. 

Stuck as a Black person. 

Stuck as a White person. 

I question many things. But the number one thing I do not question is God. 

And God gives us the opportunity to decide. 

Decide to be a part of the change that you wish to see? Or decide to standby and shrink back into your conflict-avoidable comfort zone?

The choice is ours, and I’ve decided. 

As a Black person, I’ve decided to stand for my people. With my people. And speak through my people with the word of God and the strength of my faith. 

As a White person, I’ve decided to unlearn and re-educate myself in the country I was born in. The systemic issues I didn’t pay attention to. And the deeply rooted problematic tensions I pushed to the side.

As a biracial person, I choose to be a voice of unity. 

What will you choose to do? 

If you’d like to join me, I’ve created an easy starters guide of systemic racism resources that I’ll be diving into over the next couple of weeks. You can get that guide below. 

Systemic Racism: Unlearn and Re-educate

A short and honest resource guide detailing what I’ll be diving into over the next couple of weeks. Feel free to use or share with whoever you’d like!

You can also check out the details at the bottom of this post that lists various organizations to consistently donate to or participate in.

Together, let’s be the change that we want to see in the world. 

Organizations to donate to:

• http://minnesotafreedomfund.org: Community based non-profit that pays criminal bail and immigration bonds for individuals who have been arrested while protesting police brutality

• https://www.blackvisionsmn.org: Dedicated to black liberation. Committed to dismantling systems of oppression and violence.

• https://www.reclaimtheblock.org/home: Advocates and invests in community led safety initiatives.

• https://www.joincampaignzero.org/#vision: Utilizes research based policy solutions to end police brutality in America.

• https://unicornriot.ninja: Dedicated to exposing root causes of dynamic social and environmental issues

• https://www.change.org: Sign a petition to initiate change and mobilize support.

Systemic Racism Starter Guide:

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